So, remember how Danger said today was amazing? Well, this news is either going to make today extra super duper amazing, or turn it into what happens after you ingest an entire plate of Unyawns Cajun Chicken Ciabatta: Guy Fieri and Smash Mouth (and Sammy Hagar!) have teamed up to write a cookbook together.
SF Weekly directs us to the Amazon page for Smash Mouth: Recipes from the Road: A Rock ‘n’ Roll Cookbook, which uses an excess of colons to make up for what all that red meat is going to do to yours:
Smash Mouth invades the culinary world with a rock n’ roll cookbook. Recipes From The Road [due out October 16] is a unique fusion of delicious recipes, hilarious real-life road stories straight from “The Mouth”, candid road photos, and guest recipes from pop icons such as Guy Fieri (Diners Drive-ins and Dives), Sammy Hagar (Van Halen), Jerome Bettis (Pittsburgh Steelers), and Michael Symon (Iron Chef, The Chew), all displayed in a beautiful, eye-popping layout. (Via)
First off, “The Mouth”? Screw you guys SO hard. Also, it’s a shame they couldn’t get Barry Foster instead of Bettis — like everyone involved with this book, he has some great stories about being awful. Anyway, we know that Fieri and Smash Mouth “singer” Steve Harwell are BFFs, so it’s not a reach to suggest that the recipes contained within the new Holy Bible will employ the King Koopa’s love of dumb puns. Let’s help them out:
- All Marzipan Stuffed with Bacon Fries
- Walkin’ On the Sunny-Side Up Eggs
- Can’t Get Enough of You Baby Back Ribs
- Then the Corn-Casserole-Ing Comes
- I’m a Believer…In Fried Chicken Heads with Ranch Dressing Poppers
OK, I admit that last one kind of sucked, but leave your own suggestions. We’ll make our own cookbook of Smash Mouth recipe puns…with the guys from Everclear. Then talk about how our parents hate us.
![[avatar]](http://p.uproxxcdn.com/photo/679/thumb)
![[image]](http://cdn.uproxx.com/wp-content/thumbnails/130/110/2013/05/fnd_Funky-Finds-in-Flavortown-Giveaway_s4x3_lg-150x150.jpg)
![[image]](http://cdn.uproxx.com/wp-content/thumbnails/130/110/2013/03/Screen-shot-2013-03-25-at-6.59.50-PM-150x150.png)
![[image]](http://cdn.uproxx.com/wp-content/thumbnails/130/110/2013/02/fieri-150x150.jpg)
![[image]](http://cdn.uproxx.com/wp-content/thumbnails/130/110/2013/02/guy-fieri-fake-menu-banner-150x150.jpg)
So you’re telling me Guy Fieri ISN’T the lead singer of Smash Mouth? Mind. Blown.
*Golf Clap*… awesome
Came here to see if someone made this joke yet.
Leaving feeling smug and satisfied.
I had to check Guy Fieri’s Wikipedia page earlier to make sure. BTW, that page revealed a couple of factoids I was previously ignorant of.
1. Guy’s real name is “Guy Ferry.”
2. He was born in Ohio.
Both of these things seem quite fitting.
[en.wikipedia.org]
Pictured: Sorry, we couldn’t get Xzibit here for the photoshoot.
Yo Dawg! I heard you like to cook when you cook, etc., etc. ZZZZ.
you guys remember when they said the large hedron collider could make a mini black hole and the world would explode? If this doesn’t do it nothing will.
This news came to me while I was listening to a Mighty Mighty Bosstones song. Seems appropriate.
If only the guy lurking off to the left had a gun drawn, this picture would have given me hope.
Are we sure this is a real thing and not just a SNL commercial parody?
Also, anyone who buys this book should not be trusted with knives and/or an oven.
SNL parody or tweet from @dadboner
I would’ve bet 20 bucks that picture was photoshopped had I not read this post.
I’m actually in favor of a cookbook with Everclear recipes. Just not the band.
How does this happen. What… Man fuck the world today.
I knew these two would find each other. It was destiny.
the “You Might As Well Just Vomit on a Bun” chipotle-wasabi corned beef hash sandwich?
also i hope there’s a very prominent disclaimer regarding proper seafood handling on the “Hey Now, It’s a Raw Bar” chapter
Changing “Guy Ferry” to “Guy Fieri” has got to be the lamest attempt at a stage name, ever.
He’s pretty much just trying to troll us on purpose now, isn’t he?
Sooooooooome BODY once ASKED could I SPARE some ribs and hash, I need to get myself a mouthful or taaaaa-haaaste…..
I said yep, what a concept, I could use a little hash myself, and we could alllll use a little, meeeeeeeeeeaaaaat
WELL THE PORK STARTS COMING AND IT DON’T STOP COMING, FED TO MY FACE AND THEN I SHIT MY PANTS RUNNING
Didn’t make sense not to smoke that beef, the meat gets soft but the fat gets yum.
So much to pork so much to beef, so what’s wrong with wearing some meat grease
Hey now, you’re a hock star, get your meat on, gooo braaaaaaaaise…
All that simmers is poooooooooooooork.
Well fucking played Mr. Mancini, well played. Now I look forward to you randomly interrupting the Frotcast with these Smashmouth cookbook lyrics.
luv u so much, vince
this is going to be stuck in my head for the next three years, f u catchy smashmouth lyrics.
Damn, Vince. You officially made my day. Now, if only DadBoner would post something on this I could die a happy man. I don’t know what it is about his “, you guys” that so completely sells that character, but it fucking kills me every time.
Titles – “Everyday Cooking Made Douchier”, “The Joy of Dystentery”, “Dishes That Look Great But Taste Awful as suggested by Bands That Look Great But Sound Awful”, “Bro-Tastic Meals, Dude!”, “You Can’t Polish A Turd”
Do you really think Smashmouth “looks great”…?
You win this round Mayans.
*waits patiently for world to end*
damn you Vince, its like you’ve been waiting for this story…
I like that nobody broke his string. Everyone could see a master at work.
Also, I’m pretty sure he had a similar string during the whole “Smashmouth, please eat the eggs” debacle. Man loves him some Smashmouth food puns.
That’s true, Lobsey! If I was as good as him I’d post up Smashmouth food puns everywhere I could.
Prologue written by Wilmer Valderama.
How does Guy Fieri eat, when all photographic evidence suggests that he’s incapable of closing his mouth?
I can’t wait for Smash Mouth: Recipes from the Road: A Rock ‘n’ Roll Cookbook: The Musical
Is Smash Mouth a euphemism for blowjobs?
Why is every salad dressed with vinegar and water?
I loved Hagar’s mashed potato recipe, “I Can’t Knife Fifty Chives”
…not to mention his special stir-fry dish, “There’s Only One Way to Wok”.
How do I know when it’s done?
I caaann’t tell you, read a thermometer.
I just want to say that Vince was completely on point with these jokes. The sarcasm had just the right amount of kick and I could really savor all the loathing just dripping from his voice.
Surely this is the greatest example of synergy between music and cuisine since “Rock n’ Roll McDonald’s”.
Clearly you have forgotten – KISS: The Happy Meal.
No mention of this Lambo in the list of cars he owns.
They are probably making a music video out together that will be funny!