It’s been a frustrating afternoon trying to find a news story that won’t piss a lot of you off. Sure, I could’ve written about Tina Fey going on a rant about Todd Akin rant, but I’d get POLITICS SUCK from our readers. Saved by the Bell’s Lark Voorhies, meanwhile, denied being crazy by acting crazy, but I actually thought that was kind of a mean story that I’d feel bad about posting. Plus, TMZ. Ew. President Obama gave Jay Leno his highest ratings since his return in 2010, but Leno. Ew. Snooki said a cuss word on TV, but again: Ew. Also, don’t care.
Anyway, I thought if was going to avoid icky Ew stories, I could at least do a cool Ew post, namely these fantastically scary cereal-box mascots from artist Guillermo Fajardo, who gives us horrifying images of the mascots from our favorite breakfast cereal commercials. TRIX ARE FOR DEAD KIDS, MOTHERF*****.
Check em’ out.
Walt Junior’s reaction:
(Source: Guillermo Fajardo via Hiconsumption)
![[avatar]](http://p.uproxxcdn.com/photo/4006/thumb)
![[image]](http://cdn.uproxx.com/wp-content/thumbnails/130/110/2013/05/beer-of-thrones-150x150.jpg)
![[image]](http://cdn.uproxx.com/wp-content/thumbnails/130/110/2013/05/Screen-Shot-2013-05-23-at-1.57.01-PM-150x150.png)
![[image]](http://cdn.uproxx.com/wp-content/thumbnails/130/110/2013/05/walter-150x150.jpg)
![[image]](http://cdn.uproxx.com/wp-content/thumbnails/130/110/2013/05/here-is-a-russian-cell-phone-commercial-that-features-a-stop-motion-scuba-diving-dog-uproxx-150x150.jpg)
Count Chocula looks kind of cuddly.
Also, that Tony makes far more sense. When I was a kid I saw an advert in which he was shown at home, and he had a tiger-skin rug on his floor. Ever since then I’ve assumed Tony was a monstrous serial killer, preying on his own kind, but if he’s actually a human who kills tigers and wears their skins, Jame Gumb style, he’s suddenly far less terrifying.
… I was an impressionable kid, okay?
You know we’ve hit the point of exhaustion when the “politics suck” people come out of their caverns.
That being said, that Trix rabbits looks like he’s ready to go touch little kids instead of steal their cereal.
Tony the Tiger looks like an awesome pro wrestler.
I stay away from your Ew posts because I think you’re trying to link me to Entertainment Weekly. Unconscionable.
I might have eaten more cereal as a kid if those boxes actually looked like that.