In what reads like crappy fan fiction from a Singled Out fan in the 1990s, vaccine-hater, Vaseline-lover Jenny McCarthy once took too much ecstasy, and proceeded to “rub [her] head and boobs all over” a tree. What a shame; that tree was one day away from retirement. His pension package was copies of Dirty Love to explode.
The 40-year-old [former Playboy] model — who has previously dated Jim Carrey — once took too much of the party drug ecstasy, and found herself pressed up against a tree trying to have intercourse with it after becoming unsteady on her feet.
She said: “I found myself holding a tree to brace myself. The texture felt so good that I decided to rub my head and boobs all over it. It was a tree I was humping!” (Via)
Fittingly, former Playboy models have their own veteran’s day, in which all the bunnies-turned-made for TV sequel stars reunite and tell stories about the past. McCarthy loves to bring out that ol’ chestnut (ugh), but it’s still less embarrassing than what Shannon Tweed once had sex with: Gene Simmons. *shudder*
![[avatar]](http://p.uproxxcdn.com/photo/679/thumb)
![[image]](http://cdn.uproxx.com/wp-content/thumbnails/130/110/2011/01/jennymccarthy-150x150.jpg)
Why the fuck did I just watch that?
i watched it to remind myself that Chris Hardwick has been sucking nearly 20 years.
For about a year after he started The Nerdist Podcast, I found him charming and endearing. I rooted for him to make it back into the big time. Even though in his interviews with stars, he felt he had to prove to his guests that yes, he used to be on TV. Now, he looks back at his former “trying to make it in this business” self and looks down his nose. He’s not grateful. He feels that he deserves it. He had an hour-long special on Comedy Central this weekend. And I did nothing but roll my eyes.
his general demeanor reminds me of Jimmy Fallon. he seems like a very nice and sweet guy, but he’s painfully unfunny and awkward. like fallon he’s hyper, giggly, and prone to showering his interview subjects with so much praise and fawning that it’s just uncomfortable and you start to wonder “dude, no person loves as many things and people with as much enthusiasm as you seem to”. dude just annoys the fuck out of me.
I am shocked – SHOCKED – that a guy who professes to be a nerd comes off as socially awkward.
eh, it’s possible to be a nerd and not be a total spazz. Kevin Smith/Seth Rogen for instance
Ha ha, it’s funny because she’s helped kill like, a thousand kids.
Rubbing your head and boobs on something does not equate with humping something.
Yeah, I don’t think she knows how sex works.
*Makes a mental note to mail her a copy of Evil Dead.*
I demand the title of this post be changed to “Jenny McCarthy Let a Tree Titty-Fuck Her While High on Ecstasy”.
Once you go green, you just annoy the shit out of your friends and family for the rest of your life.