‘Dallas’ Star Larry Hagman Will Appear Posthumously In A CBS Reality Show, Was Awesome

CBS announced today that Larry Hagman, the recently deceased Dallas star and noted immaculate eyebrow-haver, will appear posthumously in an episode of their new reality series I Get That A Lot.

The actor filmed his segment — in which he masquerades as a Costco employee shilling free samples of barbeque sauce — in September. Hagman “was a prankster at heart,” I Get That A Lot executive producer Eric Schotz said in a statement, adding that “the fans’ reactions when they found out it was him are priceless.” [EW]

I bring this up for a few reasons. First of all, it gives me an excuse to again point out that his eyebrows, especially in his advanced years, were a national treasure on par with the collected works of Mark Twain, and they should be treated as such by future generations. Second of all, it allows me to remind you that Larry Hagman lived his life at an 11 pretty much all the time, including drinking five bottles of champagne a day on the set of the original Dallas, being cool as sh-t (seriously, read that story), and doing, well, this upon meeting legendary stick-in-the-mud Lauren Bacall:

I had been rehearsing with her stand-in for two weeks before I met her, and I was told, “Do not kiss her, and do not touch her if you can help it,” and it was driven into my mind. So I am ushered into her dressing room, and she presented her hand kind of like the Dowager Empress Maria Theresa of the Austro-Hungarian empire would offer her hand. I just couldn’t resist it. I licked her from her hand up to her elbow. She held it in check very well, though I do think it may have colored our relationship.

And finally, it means I can pass along this quote from the same New York Times interview, which I have been wanting to do for a while, but kept forgetting about:

You wrote in your memoir, “Hello Darlin’,” that when you die, you want to be ground up in a wood chipper like Steve Buscemi’s character in the movie “Fargo.” Is this actually set down in your will?

Well, it’s hard to set down chipping. I don’t think that’s allowed. But I did want to be spread over a field and have marijuana and wheat planted and harvest it in a couple of years and then have a big marijuana cake, enough for 200 to 300 people. People would eat a little of Larry.

In conclusion, Larry Hagman seemed like a pretty cool fella, and I really wish I had bumped into him while he was hawking barbecue sauce at Costco for this stupid show.

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