Have you guys noticed that Alison Brie has been, like, EVERYWHERE lately promoting Community? She was on Letterman a couple of weeks ago, on Fallon night before last and last night she was on the Daily Show. But hey you know where she hasn’t been during this recent publicity blitz? UPROXX! A few of you may have noticed. Frankly, it’s time we put our foot down, dangit!
It’s not for lack of trying, mind you. For about a year I’ve been regularly reaching out to Alison’s people to try to book her for a live discussion with readers — like the one Joel McHale did so wonderfully last week (Love u, Joel!) and Jim Rash did last year — or to have her do an UPROXX 20. So far, our efforts have proven frustratingly fruitless. WHY WON’T YOU RETURN ANY OF OUR CALLS OR TEXTS, ALISON?! Have we creeped you out? We probably creeped you out.
Look, Alison, we’re harmless. I promise. Collectively we only have a handful of restraining orders out against us at any given time, and all of those, I assure you, are the result of simple misunderstandings. So come hang with us some time, won’t you? We helped to make you for the love of God!
Look, there’s no website on the internet that showers you and Community with more love and adoration. A kiss on the cheek would be nice. That’s all we’re asking. Joel already let us down easy as for the hopes of anything greater.
(Thinks about what could have been. Sighs.)
So have your people get in touch with us, okay? BTW you looked very pretty on the Daily Show last night, but you’d look even prettier on UPROXX. JUST SAYING!!!