Christoph Waltz Would Like To Teach You The Art Of Seduction

Going into every February 14th my goal is to not get sucked into writing anything Valentine’s Day related. It’s all too easy and V Day content is so February 13th. But then something — like everyone’s favorite Austrian-German Oscar-baiting actor making an instructional video on the art of seduction — happens and I give in. Without fail.

Let’s be clear: the below sketch for Jimmy Kimmel Live is not funny. At least not in the clever or ironic or even good sense. It’s funny in the Christoph Waltz ain’t care/will-be-awesome-even-if-the-SNL-writers-hang-him-out-to-dry sense.

Moral of the story: there are worse ways to kick start the dumbest day of the year than with Christoph Waltz teaching you how to properly use your own pheromones to your sexual advantage. Pro tip: Stick around for the last :15 seconds.

Jimmy Kimmel Live

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