
Mark Wahlberg brought his NAWT YOU NAWT YOU NAWT YOU Southie shtick overseas last night, to BBC’s The Graham Norton Show, where he was visibly drunk, flirted with Sarah Silverman, and challenged Michael Fassbender to a “big d*ck contest.” Sorry, ladies, no d*cks, big or otherwise, were whipped out; the competition was about voice actor work, which Fassbender owned at. Of course HE knows how to convincingly imitate a silencer.
The British press is SHOCKED:
He revealed he will be showing up to the Oscars with his cuddly yet inappropriate co-star Ted and will have to ‘try and extinguish the fires.’ But it seems Mark Wahlberg may want to put his own out first after the actor appeared on The Graham Norton Show rather worse for wear as it aired on Friday evening.
The star’s behaviour prompted Twitter users to question his sobriety as he sat on the chat show host’s lap and played with his nipples, as well as getting rather frisky with his fellow guest Sarah Silverman. (Via)
He also told a wonderful anecdote about his son punching the Rock in the nuts. Some people are mad at Wahlberg for loudly talking over Silverman and Fassbender, but I, personally, wished he had been even more drunk. Silverman and Fassbender, too. I’d pay good money to watch the three of them have sex while eating I Heart Beef Chuckabees sandwiches from Wahlburgers and dirty talking the ways they would have stopped acts of terrorism.
Which Fassbender probably actually has.



A) Please don’t ever refer to the Daily Mail as “the British Press” again. It is to the British press in general as Westboro Baptist Church is to Christianity.
B) I’d happily watch Fassbender and Silverman have sex (I think Fassbender would be vigorous, yet tender, while Silverman would be aggressive and very inventive… it’s a good combo, and I have already thought about this far more than is healthy), but leave Wahlberg out of it.
But their use of adjectives is so fair and journalist’y!
She’s got the jimmy legs though, which would make staying over next to impossible.
very true, although, the Daily mail does voice the opinion of the masses more often than not in the comments section.
My thoughts exactly. The Daily Mail only exists as a platform for faux moral outrage.
I got the creeps when Wahlberg made a move on Silverman, but I was fine with her and Fassbender getting freaky.
Norton was handling it well though.
Sarah Silverman can bust out her thighs whenever she wants. No complaints here.
“Hey Sarah Silverman. I like your fashion tights, your thighs are great. I was in ‘Four Brothers’ did you see that movie? Cool. Sat hi to your mother for me.”
ya they totally banged
That was truly an experience.
she was flirting with wahlberg, but she went home with fassbender. girl ain’t no fool.
It must be great to walk into a room and people think three things:
1. Wow, how handsome!
2. What a good actor!
3. Huge dong. Like HUGE.
I mean I’m used to it, but for uh…other people, it must…uh suck.
I actually wonder if everyone knowing about #3 works against him sometimes? I’m sure there are a few ladies out there who have said “I want to go home with Michael Fassbender, but I don’t want to be walking around in pain for the next 48 hours.
/still wishes he was hung like Fassbender
I thought the Brit’s were supposed to be the laid back ones with a sense of humor? That ish was too funny.
Marky Mark = 100% homosexual!
Marky becomes her naturally nelly self when she get on the boozette!
marky mark needs to drunkingly tell me about all his movies
OAWAH DICK AWAH BIGGAH DAN YOUAH DICKS. NO ONE DENIES THIS!
*dicks. FACK.
Best Graham Norton Show on the current run and there have been other good ones too, but this was by far the best. I loved how Drunk Marky Mark made the poor girl from Dublin endure the chair three times before she told her really lame story. Why no other guest has tried that before, I don’t know.
It’s crazy that no US talk show has the “all guests on at the same time” concept. It completely changes the dynamic.
Very good point. I’m surprised none has commandeered the lever before.
The networks don’t like to deviate from the standard format. Ferguson went and sat down during a monologue a few months back, and supposedly the network execs went ballistic over it.
9/11 would have been stopped by Marky Mark’s pecks you can’t deny that.
How bad do you think Wahlberg tried to cock-block the Fasspenis after the show?
“Counseling” + Drunk Wahlberg = “Cow sling”
All this talk about Fassbender’s cock, yet nobody mentioned Sarah Silverman’s tits and vag in Take This Waltz?
Graham did….
“Yeah, it’s called art…”
LMAO Sarah Silverman gotta love her
I’ve been way drunker than that and I’ve never hit on Sarah Silverman.