PRODUCTION NOTE: The writer of last night's episode, our pal VJ Boyd, will be dropping by around 3:30ish to answer questions and chat in the comments. Feel free to load up and check back in later in the afternoon. We'll blast out an update on Twitter and Facebook to remind you, too. Should be fun.
People on Justified got schemes, y'all. Schemes and secrets galore. A quick rundown:
Boyd is working with Wynn Duffy to find Drew Thompson, and paying off lawyers to torpedo Arlo's deal. Wynn Duffy is working with Theo Tonin's people to do the same, and continues to have secret meetings with Johnny Crowder about sending Boyd to wherever well-read sociopaths go when they die. Art has successfully taken the Thompson case away from the FBI thanks to the corrupt agent from the other week tainting the case. The corrupt agent's boss was also working for Theo Tonin, until he got a bullet in the head courtesy of the former host of Nickelodeon's GUTS. Ava is packing up the belongings of a hooker she thinks is dead, and mailing them to Alabama so no one suspects anything. Chubby Mitch Hedberg is turning Kentucky upside-down looking for said hooker, who is very much not dead, and he is trying to hide the whole thing from Boyd. Oh, and the reason he can't find her is because the puppet sheriff Boyd put in place last season is hiding her under his dinner table in an attempt to get her to talk about a murder Ava and Boyd covered up, because now he wants to take Boyd down. (For those keeping score, that makes three people -- not including members of the US government -- who are currently plotting against Boyd.) And we haven't even gotten to Major Dad and his detached foot yet.
The only person in last night's episode who wasn't neck-deep in subterfuge was Raylan, because Raylan is less of a schemer and more of a "Welp, I guess I'll grab this picture, throw on my flannel jacket, and march through the woods until I get some answers from some hill people" kind of guy.
As always, here are some other highlights, and GIFs from Chet Manley.
- Patton Oswalt was back last night as Constable Bob, and he was turning down oral sex from metal-mouthed teenagers and offering to let Raylan use his go-bag. We only saw him for a few minutes, but they were delightful.
- Wynn Duffy's reaction to the FBI agent getting his head blown off was terrific. As are Wynn Duffy's reactions to everything. He is a very difficult man to fluster. ("Not a problem.")
- Here is all you need to know about Raylan's personal life: He missed a message from Winona about their baby appointment being moved, gave her crap about her showing up late, offered her a cold, caffeinated coffee, found out he was actually 30 minutes late, talked about his job for a while, then left Winona in the waiting room to run off and fight crime. He's gonna be a great dad.
- Nothing -- and I mean nothing -- would make me happier than Mike O'Malley's character (a Theo Tonin goon) getting arrested and going to trial, and the judge turning out to be Mo from GUTS .
- If the producers at FX ever need to save a little money, allow me to offer this suggestion: Raylan and Boyd locked in a box for an hour talking about movies. That's it. No plot, no other characters, nothing.
- Tim was on screen for like three minutes total last night, and he still managed to drop in a "I dunno, I was probably too young to be blowing the head off of Taliban" in response to Raylan teasing him about enjoying children's books. Maybe we can put him in the box with Raylan and Boyd for that money-saving episode, too.
- Losing money hurts, sure. But do you know what hurts worse? Getting shot in the eye.
- Look at the big balls on Shelby.
- There was a sign in the Crowder bar that said "Pay Cash Or Get Served Buckshot." I thought you might like to know.
I suppose that's a good place to stop. Please do not come to my house and cut off my foot.
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