News Anchor Can’t Stop Laughing At Woman Who Shoved Gun Up Her Vagina, Meth In Her Butt

Ladies, you don’t realize how lucky you are. If I had a vagina, I’d shove everything I own up there. Business cards, matchbooks, Jon Hamm nudie pens, whatever else I need to get through the day. But here I am, a dude, stuck having to wear pants with pockets like a sucker. The curious case of Christie only furthers my jealously.

An Oklahoma woman arrested Monday on drug charges had a loaded handgun hidden in her vagina, according to police.

The weapon was discovered during a search of Christie Dawn Harris, 28, by a female officer with the Ada Police Department. According to a police report, the cop spotted the handle of the five-shot revolver “sticking out from” inside Harris, who is seen at right.

In a less shocking find, investigators also discovered plastic baggies containing methamphetamine lodged in the crack of Harris’s buttocks. (Via)

I’m so glad we’re alive at a time when “meth up the butt” is considered “less shocking.”

While being transported to jail, Harris “stated several times that she needed to go to the bathroom.”

At the lockup, Harris was directed to change out of her clothes into “jail clothing.” When directed to lower her underwear so that a female cop could check for contraband, Harris “advised that she was on her period and did not want to.”

Harris eventually complied with the cop’s order. “I observed at that time a wooden and metal item sticking out from her vagina area,” reported Officer Kathy Unbewust, who added that she “pulled the item from her vagina, and found it to be a 5 shot revolver with rounds in the chamber.” (Via)

Man, Chechen Roulette is getting really popular. Here is an entirely appropriate reaction to this story.

(Via Smoking Gun)