Educating the Malcolm (Malcolm in the Middle)
For when a sitcom goes for the “awwww” moment rather than the one that makes sense. (Sidenote: I’m still pissed at the Malcolm finale. HEY LOIS, IF YOUR SON GETS AN AMAZING JOB OFFER AFTER GRADUATING HIGH SCHOOL, HE DOESN’T HAVE TO GO TO COLLEGE AND PAY TENS OF THOUSANDS OF DOLLARS IN STUDENT LOANS. JUST BECAUSE YOU THINK HE’S GOING TO BE PRESIDENT DOESN’T MEAN BOOM HE’S THE PRESIDENT. MY PARENTS WANTED ME TO BE AN ASTRONAUT GROWING UP, AND NOW LOOK AT ME, I’M WRITING ABOUT MALCOLM IN THE MIDDLE IN ALL CAPS. GRR.)
Killing the Alligator (The Simpsons)
For when a show doesn’t look at itself in the mirror and ask, “Do we really need this Joe C. cameo?”
Ditching the Santiago (Friday Night Lights)
For when a recurring character is erased from the face of the Earth, never to be heard from again.
Winning the Lotto (Roseanne)
For when a show completely scrubs away its original premise, because $$$.
Losing the Mulder (The X-Files)
For when an essential character leaves, yet the show keeps going on and on and on.
I want more like this!
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