All Christopher Titus Needs Is A Bottle Of 18 Year-Old Macallan To Make Everything Alright

Christopher Titus is a comedian and actor perhaps best known for the Fox series Titus — for which he was the star, executive producer and co-creator — as well as his long running one-man show, Norman Rockwell is Bleeding. Titus is currently touring the U.S. and will be in the coming months performing his new stand-up show, The Angry Pursuit of Happiness. Additionally, his most recent standup special, Voice in My Head, is now available on DVD.

Christopher was nice enough to take a few minutes out of his busy schedule recently to answer a few questions from us.

1. You walk into a bar. What do your order from the bartender?

An 18 year old Macallan and leave the bottle, I just had to deal with my ex.

2. Who’s your favorite person to follow on Twitter?

Steve Martin. Always funny smart and rarely a dick joke unless its in Iambic pantameter.

3. What’s currently waiting for you on your DVR/TiVO?

Daily Show. Always. I need something to steal from for my podcast.

4. It’s your last meal — what are you going out with?

Hugos, turkey wrap, Cranberry Bliss bar, finish the bottle of Macallan then have popcorn in my pockets while I ride the lightning.

5. What websites do you visit on a regular basis?

Craigslist. for all the vices that aren’t covered by doing stand up.

6. What’s the most frequently played song on your iPod?

Everlast, “Ends.”

7. The first face that comes to mind when you think “punchable”?

Hitler, but I waited too long.

8. What’s your favorite meme?

Pepper spray cop. Love his casual violence.

9. Dogs or cats?

Dogs, unless I’m wearing panties, then cats.

10. Best concert of your life was…?

Springsteen. 1985 Oakland Coliseum… and every other Springsteen show

11. What book are you most likely to give as a gift?

The Bible. For the violence and the comedy.

12. What’s the nicest thing anyone has ever done for you?

The guy that cheated with my ex. Thanks bro! I’m actually happy now.

13. South Park or Family Guy?

South Park, the moral compass for America.

14. You have an entire day to do whatever you want. What would you do?

Snowboard or Wakeboard.

15. What movie can you not resist watching if it’s on?

Pulp Fiction. I always get something new from the Ving Rhames rape scene.

16. Android or iPhone?

Iphone until I can have my own real Android. C3PO Bitches!

17. Where did you eat the best meal of your life?

Geoffrey’s in Malibu. It’s food sex.

18. The last movie you saw in a theater?

Gravity. It really brought me down.

19. Who was your first celebrity crush?

Valerie Bertanelli on One Day at a Time. Not post Van Halen.

20. What would you cook if Nic Cage was coming to your house for dinner?

I’d make my Salmon. Then we would crank down some Macallan and I’d ask if John Travolta hit on him.

Here’s a clip from Voice in My Head

(Previously: Chef Richard Blais)

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