People Believe That Andy Kaufman Is Alive And Well In Albuquerque

Written by Ashley Burns / 05.22.13

On July 16, the folks at Drag City will release a brand new comedy album of never-before-heard material from the legendary Andy Kaufman, taken from more than 82 hours of micro-cassettes that Kaufman recorded between 1977 and 1979. For a lot of fans of the former Women’s Wrestling Champion of the World, this album, “Andy and His Grandmother”, will be bittersweet, because as it provides us with something new to enjoy from the man who passed on way too soon, it will also remind us that it will once again be the last that we ever hear from him.

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Obama’s Former Campaign Tech Team Weighed In On The Great GIF Debate

Written by Ashley Burns / 05.22.13

In case you were doing something more important yesterday evening, like anything, we had a pretty serious debate here about GIF inventor Steve Wilhite’s declaration that the acronym for Graphic Interchange Format is actually pronounced, “JIF”. But just because he invented the GIF and therefore knows the pronunciation of the very thing that he created, does that necessarily mean that he has the right to tell us how to say it?

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Mother Of Two Talked Down Machete-Wielding Terrorists Moments After They Killed A Soldier

Written by Josh Kurp / 05.22.13

Any sentence that includes the description “machete-wielding” probably isn’t going to end well, and unfortunately, this story is no exception. Earlier today in London, a solider was hacked to death, in public, by two machete-wielding religious terrorists, including one man who spoke calmly into a cell phone minutes after the attack.

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A Naked San Antonio Man Has A Pretty Sweet Keyboard For Sale On Craigslist

Written by Ashley Burns / 05.22.13

I suppose if you’re going to sell a radical musical instrument, you need to let any potential buyers know just how much it lets you rock. And nothing says rock n’ roll like posing naked with a Nord Lead keyboard like this San Antonio gentleman did for his May 15 Craigslist ad.

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Here Is A Supercut Of Jay Leno Making People Sad

Written by The Cajun Boy / 05.22.13

A lot of people think that if you want to get back at an ex the best thing to do is to bang their best friend. This is wrong. The best thing to do — if you want to unleash an avalanche of crushing sadness upon them — is to kidnap them and force them to watch Jay Leno monologues on a loop for days. No one who truly knows evil in their heart denies this.

As a thesis, if you will, of how effective Leno is at making people sad, we present to you a supercut by Dane Boaz of Leno making people sad. We rest our case.

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Meet Ahmed Angel, The Internet’s Most Gorgeous Airbrushed Male Model

Written by Josh Kurp / 05.22.13

Soon or later, Zoolander 2 is going to happen. It’s debatable whether a sequel to a comedy that came out 12 years later should be made, just so Ben Stiller can pay for a peeing-only bathroom, but there’s one thing we can all agree on: the movie NEEDS to star Ahmed Angel, the so-called “most beautiful man in the world.”

Angel is an Iraqi male model who the IBT describes as a “perfectly-coiffed, impeccably groomed, and ultra-mysterious social media presence, who may or may not be real.” I, for one, choose to believe he’s real — people don’t think God’s real, either, unless they’re one and the same… — because, I mean, just look at his Facebook.

Might as well get used to seeing Angel’s face now; he’s going to Blue Steel Zoolander 2 away from Stiller.

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Bill Murray Knows How To Respond To Crying Babies

Written by Josh Kurp / 05.22.13

Breaking news. We found the only person in the world who doesn’t love Internet god Bill Murray: a baby, a baby who’s probably related to Jon Snow because he knows nothing. Earlier in the week, “Laura R.” from Scotland submitted a photo of her child to Reasons My Son is Crying, with the simple caption, “He met Bill Murray.”

Murray, of course, had the perfect response. Hey, he’s worked with Dan Aykroyd — he’s used to dealing with babies.

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Airbnb Is Officially Illegal In New York

Written by Dan Seitz / 05.22.13

Airbnb is a service largely popular among tourists, as well as the occasional prostitute, looking for a place to crash in New York City (and many other places as well) who don’t want to pay exorbitant rates to stay at a hotel. Unfortunately, New York courts have decided it’s better for you to stay in a motel on Long Island than in a stranger’s home. Read the rest of this entry »

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Man Sets Up Camera To Film Ghosts, Ends Up Recording His Wife Having Sex With His Underage Son

Written by Josh Kurp / 05.22.13

Giving unpleasant associations to the words “ghosts” and “busting,” a 28-year-old woman pleaded guilty to five counts of sexual intercourse with a young person, after her husband, who had set up a camera to film “paranormal activity,” instead recorded her and his underage son getting friendly together. Reports the Mercury:

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