Ashton Kutcher Said Something Impossibly Stupid

In the event you haven’t heard, last night Penn State University fired legendary football coach Joe Paterno — the man who’s been the head coaching football there longer than most of the people reading this have been alive — in the wake of the revelation that he basically looked the other way when he learned that one of his assistants was a child molester. The firing prompted an uprising on the school’s campus, as students took to the streets to riot in protest. As Gawker’s Max Read eloquently put it in a headline, “Thousands of Students Riot Over Firing of Child Rapist’s Protector.”

The whole thing is just gut-wrenchingly sad. Everything about it is sad, from the countless children who were victims of sexual abuse on Penn State’s campus over the years, to Paterno transforming before our very eyes from grandfatherly legend to devious monster in the span of 72 hours or so. It’s been surreal and heartbreaking to watch it all transpire. And just when I thought that there was no way the whole thing could possibly get any more WTF?! — enter Ashton Kutcher.

As you might imagine, just about everyone on Twitter jumped his sh*t immediately after he sent this tweet. Some speculated that he’d been hacked. He had to have been, right? After all, this is the same Ashton Kutcher who launched a jihad against the Village Voice on behalf of young girls being sold into sex slavery who now finds it in “poor taste” that Penn State fired a guy who looked the other way when he learned that one of his assistants was f*cking little boys?

As it turns out, Kutcher’s either a) a moron or b) hideously uninformed for someone who fancies himself as an advocate of child sexual abuse, or c) a really bad liar. Or possibly all three.

20 minutes or so after he posted the above tweet, Kutcher began responding to some of the angry responses directed at him. He claimed to have had NO IDEA of the Penn State kid-f*cking scandal. In his words he “thought (Paterno’s firing) was a football thing.” He then went back and deleted most of those tweets, in addition to the one that set off the initial firestorm. All that are left on the matter are these two.

I’m calling bullsh*t. There’s simply no way — NO WAY — this guy did not know that Joe Paterno was at the center of sexual abuse scandal. This story has been EVERYWHERE and it’s been going on for days now, and Kutcher is a pretty big sports fan. If he had access to Twitter, which he obviously did, he would have seen something about it. I think he realized what an utterly retarded thing he said when the backlash came and he then tried to clean up his mess by lying. The guy can’t even act when trying to play ignorant on Twitter.

In other words, Ashton Kutcher is an idiot. But I think we all already knew that.

UPDATES: The 20 Finest #KutcherTweets & Ashton Kutcher Quits Twitter

×