Dumbest Food Study Ever Answers Question No One Asked

The Department of Chemical and Bioprocesses Engineering at the Pontifical Catholic University of Chile (go Vicuñas!) recently conducted a highly SCIENTIFIC study determining the “physical properties and microstructural changes during soaking of individual corn and quinoa breakfast flakes.” Mmm…breakfast flakes! To put that into real people words, they tested to see what’s better in cereal: milk or water.

WATER??? What kind of monster puts water in their cereal? That’s even worse than putting mayonnaise on, well, anything. I’m sorry, I can get behind a lot of weird food mixtures — heck, I’ve even been known to put mustard on my scrambled eggs — but I can’t defend water in cereal. Wouldn’t that just make everything soggy without adding any extra flavor? It’d be like eating wet cardboard for breakfast.

Soaked flakes were freeze-dried and their cross section and surface examined by scanning electron microscopy. Three consecutive periods (fast, gradual, and slow reduction of RF) were associated with changes in the microstructure of flakes. These changes were more pronounced in distilled water than in milk 2%, probably because the fat and other solids in milk become deposited on the flakes’ surface hindering liquid infiltration. (Via)

Luckily we have SCIENCE to tell us that, SCIENTIFICALLY speaking, milk is better than water in cereal. Maybe they can study the effects of hot sauce on a burger vs. a milkshake next?

(Banner via)

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