Hackers Holding Mitt Romney’s Tax Returns For Bitcoin Ransom

In what sounds like the plotline of a spoof of a Mission Impossible-style political thriller, hackers claim to have broken into an accounting firm’s office in Tennessee and made off with copies of Mitt Romney’s unreleased tax returns — the tax returns the GOP presidential nominee has repeatedly refused to make public, for some reason no one on Earth doesn’t think is shady. The hackers are demanding $1,000,000 in bitcoin in exchange for the release the tax documents to Mitt Romney, or whoever else decides to pony up the virtual coinage for them.

Here’s how the hackers described how they obtained the tax returns…

Romney’s 1040 tax returns were taken from the PWC office 8/25/2012 by gaining access to the third floor via a gentleman working on the 3rd floor of the building. Once on the 3rd floor, the team moved down the stairs to the 2nd floor and setup shop in an empty office room. During the night, suite 260 was entered, and all available 1040 tax forms for Romney were copied. A package was sent to the PWC on suite 260 with a flash drive containing a copy of the 1040 files, plus copies were sent to the Democratic office in the county and copies were sent to the GOP office in the county at the beginning of the week also containing flash drives with copies of Romney’s tax returns before 2010. A scanned signature image for Mitt Romney from the 1040 forms were scanned and included with the packages, taken from earlier 1040 tax forms gathered and stored on the flash drives.

The tax documents will be released to the public on Sept. 28 if the ransom demand isn’t met, according to the PasteBin document. Meanwhile, PricewaterhouseCoopers is denying that anything was stolen from the Tennessee office in question.

Personally, I think this is a bunch of horsesh*t. I mean, why only ask for a million bucks when the freakin’ presidency could be riding on this? These “hackers” are either bluffing or stupid. Or maybe Dr. Evil is behind all of this?

But if they are for real I suggest Mitt Romney enlist Liam Neeson to explain exactly what he’s going to do if they don’t give the tax returns back…

Hell, I just crapped my pants looking at those GIFs and I have nothing to do with the tax returns. OR DO I?!

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