Man Named Oates Took A Bite Out Of Man Named Hall

The New York Post‘s “Headless Body in Topless Bar” is considered the most famous newspaper headline of all-time, but the Sandusky Register has come up with a classic of their own: “Maneater: Hall bitten by Oates.”

Roger Oates, 48, and Ronald Mantz, 53, were both charged with felony assault, resisting arrest and obstructing official business.

“It appeared that (the victim’s) eyebrow was almost completely bitten off,” a deputy’s report said. “Blood was flowing from the wound.”

The victim, Scott Hall, 40, told deputies he was watching football in his garage when he saw headlights in his driveway. He went outside to find his drunken neighbor, Oates, and Oates’ drunken friend, Mantz, getting out of a car, the report said.

“Scott advised (Oates) almost immediately charged at him in a ‘bull rush’ fashion,” the report said. (Via)

Roger Oates even looks exactly like John Oates:

I’M SEEING DOUBLE FOUR OATES’S. He seems like the kind of guy who’d use, “Is a kiss from me on your list? Because I’ll make your dreams come true” as his pickup line.

(Via Sandusky Register)