Possible Papal Gay Sex Scandal: Is The Pope Boning His Male Secretary?

Ever since news broke that the pope would be resigning his post effective tomorrow, anyone with the capacity for abstract thought has believed that something fishy was going on. After all, popes don’t retire — they die as the f*cking pope. Period. And with all the scandal surrounding the church in recent years, well, it’s not been much of a stretch to assume that something else other than the official reasons given for his retirement were at play.

Now, the great thing about living in the era we live in is that we can all recklessly speculate about what’s going on together on the internet. In the past, we’d be left to talk about this stuff only among the people we personally interact with. But now, thanks to the internet, we can all float juicy, scurrilous rumors that are fun to talk about, and Andrew Sullivan tossed out an absolute doozy today.

Writes Sullivan (a prominent Catholic, mind you, though a frequent critic of the church in recent years) :

Benedict XVI has claimed that his almost unprecedented resignation came about simply because of his physical infirmity in the face of what appears to be a growing vortex of sexual and financial scandal inside the Vatican. He said he would quietly disappear to serve the church through prayer and meditation. But we now realize he’s going nowhere. He’s staying in the Vatican’s walls, and retaining the honorific “His Holiness.” He will keep white robes. His full title will be Pope Emeritus. Far from wearing clerical black, returning to the title of Bishop of Rome, and disappearing into a monastery in Bavaria, he’s going to be a shadow Pope in the Vatican. And this, we are told, was his decision.

Sullivan notes that the current pope’s handsome, much younger male secretary is moving in with him in the new house on the Vatican’s grounds, while still serving as secretary for the incoming pope. This, he believes, is whack.

So Benedict’s handsome male companion will continue to live with him, while working for the other Pope during the day. Are we supposed to think that’s, well, a normal arrangement? I wrote a while back about Gänswein’s intense relationship with Ratzinger, while noting Colm Toibin’s review of Angelo Quattrochi’s exploration of Benedict, “Is The Pope Gay?”…This man – clearly in some kind of love with Ratzinger (and vice-versa) will now be working for the new Pope as secretary in the day and spending the nights with the Pope Emeritus. This is not the Vatican. It’s Melrose Place.

On the bright side, at least the pope isn’t banging any little boys.

(Pic via Shutterstock)