Today is like Christmas, Jewish Christmas, and March Madness rolled into one Dickensheets package. That’s because this year’s contestants in the Name of the Year tournament have been announced, and once again, I want to name my future child after everyone. There’s Yolanda Squatpump, Jackmeoff Mudd, Fancy English, Jr., Pooky Amsterdam (there’s no way he isn’t a pimp), and personal favorite, Dr. David L. Dickensheets.
Once again, I must take issue with the seeding (Junior Lomomba deserves better than a 16th seed), but that’s a minor quibble compared to the joy I feel knowing that there’s someone out there named Sincere Shears.
I want more like this!
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