If there are two words that tend to make scientists roll their eyes when paired together, it’s “evolutionary psychology”.
And not without reason. The problem with “evolutionary psychology” is that while the basic concept, namely that we’ve evolved certain behaviors over time and cling to them even if they’re outmoded, is intriguing, too often it’s used to cover up shoddy science, bad experimental design, or just the kind of gibbering idiocy you normally associate with creatures that lack a nervous system or basic neurological functioning, such as anybody who writes a comment on YouTube.
Oh, also flat-out racism, sexism, and blatant political agendas.
In short, it’s the intellectual dumpster where an already soft science gets so squishy you might barf if you step in it. And here are five of the worst.
#5) Falling Asleep After Sex Is So She’ll Love You!
Hey, you know how hacky comedians always joke that men finish quickly and fall asleep? Meet the scientific version of that joke.
The idea is that, by falling asleep after sex, men get to keep women from having “conversations about commitment” with them and thus make the woman more interested in being committed to them.
Of course, this idea is somewhat sabotaged by the fact that the data was assembled entirely with online surveys. But, hey, it’s still science, right?
#4) Ovulation Makes You Racist!
Apparently, if a white woman ovulates, she’s immediately afraid of black men, because they might rape her.
Here’s what we’re wondering: nobody read this and thought to say “Uh, guys, maybe you might want to check your data on this particular conclusion?”
#3) No, Evolution Made Us Racists!
Here’s a study for you: a bunch of teenagers rate various women from 1-5 as part of a study. Somebody blogging for Psychology Today adds up all the scores and immediately posts an article entitled “Why are Black Women Less Attractive?”, you know, because attractiveness is entirely decided by a small sample of horny teenagers in the suburbs. Unsurprisingly, this person is flamed to a crisp.
Oh, and if that didn’t sound mind-blowingly stupid and racist enough…
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Too bad evolutionary psychology is the only real psychology there is. All others rely on some form of ungrounded theory about the workings of the brain, while evolutionary psychology only accepts the premise that we evolved our traits from our ancestors, and that if you follow the evolutionary tree you can learn a lot about how we behave from how our closest cousins behave. This notion that we are somehow different or more logical than our ape and monkey relatives is bogus. Rape confers and evolutionary sexual advantage, as does abuse as a way to receive submission from a partner. Stalking is also an evolutionary helper, and is largely supported by evidence about the nature of stalking. The bottom line is that this politically correct “we’re better than that” attitude about our behavior is bogus. It doesn’t matter if it doesn’t make you feel good, or isn’t popular in opinion. It is still likely true, supported by evidence, and belongs to data collected by the most interesting development in psychology yet, which is evolutionary theory.
Beaton, you might want to click through on the links. None of these studies had an actual, valid scientific basis. Often the experiments are flawed in their application, construction, or both, and the conclusions can be easily explained with answers like “cultural conditioning”.
Dan’s right. Except the thing about black women being less attractive. That’s just fact. Look at Madea!
Oh, Taco, Taco, Taco, my friend, some day, you will be able to spot a man in a dress. Until then, stay away from the Castro like we told you.
Bullshit. Evolutionary Psychology is a giant collection of “just so” stories that are only loosely attached to the real world. They MIGHT be true, sure, but the vast majority is unscientific, unfalsifiable nonsense.
Beaton, you <><><>.
Evolution neither implies nor justifies rape. Observations of most social birds species show that anti-social, I’ll-take-advantage-of-you members of the flock are ostracized and therefore at a disadvantage. Rape does not confer “and” evolutionary sexual advantage in humans either, because rapists are socially ostracized and excluded from most circles of normal people. Furthermore, the fairly complex behavior of rape, an extension, no pun intended, of the basic sex drive, is frequently weeded out in the children of rape, who due to harsh childhoods, have a higher tendency towards psychological insecurity. As a result they are much more sensitive, and find better ways to be manipulate women into sex, thereby eliminating their own need for rape or wife-beating. Ignoring morality, rape is the idiot’s solution.
Word of advice: Don’t pretend to be a scientist. Your ignorance shows. I can only pray for the day when the surveillance cookies and tracking beacons peg you as a rapist and take away your kids.
Revenge is also evolutionary. Human beings all have long memories.