So, there’s going to be a new Jurassic Park movie in 2014. Hooray! In the past the Jurassic Park movies have made a decent effort to reflect what’s going on at the time in the world of paleontology. The first movie had its characters constantly going on about how dinosaurs evolved into birds, might have been warm-blooded and did move in herds. Jurassic Park III included the recently discovered Spinosaurus as its main dino-villain.
Well, paleontology didn’t go on hiatus just because the Jurassic Park series did. In the decade-plus since the last Jurassic Park movie there have been all sorts of frightening, amazing and downright wacky dinos discovered. Here are seven newly discovered dinos Spielberg and company really ought to be considering for JP4…
Gigantoraptor
What’s scarier than a raptor? How about a raptor that’s 26-feet long and weighs over two tons? For the record that’s over 35-times more massive than the Velociraptors from earlier Jurassic Park movies. Plus it’s got a parrot/turkey head that’s just f–king crazy looking.
Microraptor
Gigantic raptors are scary, but what about swarms of tiny little raptors? Tiny little feathery raptors? That would be plenty scary in its own right.
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The evidence that Sinornithosaurus was venomous is rather weak. More here: [scienceblogs.com]
The “evidence” for Jeholopterus (not a dinosaur — but at least you didn’t call it a pterodactyl) being a vampire is beyond weak. You can read more about the problems with that research here: [blogs.scientificamerican.com]
Those quibbles aside, good list!
Eh, like I said in the article, the Jurassic Park movies aren’t above straight making stuff up, so the fact that there’s any evidence at all for poison and blood drinking should be more than enough for Spielberg and company.
Also, Pterosaurs were in all my dinosaur books as a kid so they’re dinosaurs. Case closed.
Okay, but calling it “a dino we actually know was poisonous” is not correct. You don’t think you’re better than Spielberg and company?
The only dinosaurs we actually know are venomous are pitohuis: [en.wikipedia.org]
@Nate I’d figure someone who would type articles for sites like this, you would have a more comprehensive understanding of science. You should really be smart enough to know that just because a book has 2 different types of animals in it doesn’t make it one in the same. Just because whales and fish are seen in books about aquatic animal doesn’t mean that they are closely related.
And the evidence for venomous Sinornithosaurus is really weak, as the evidence is really just a matter of putting significance on the grooves and air sacs of the dinosaurs, like grasping for straws. There is NO evidence for blood drinking Jeholopterus. Not even grasping at straws. I assume you got your info on reptileevolution.com or pterosaur heresies blog? If so, I’d just say you should quit right there.
It’s really sad how dimwitted people can be when looking for a way to justify their childhoods to the point of taking anything as justification. Science doesn’t care about childhoods, it only thinks progressively.
Are you kidding? The pterodactyl scene in JP3 was one of the best parts about that movie. And in no way do I consider JP3 a “good” movie. But it had some good shit IN it.
I’d love for them to have the balls to have the majority of the dinosaurs feathered….THAT’S one of the biggest discoveries since the first Jurassic Park. I doubt they’d go ahead with it, because people have their own notions of what a dinosaur is supposed to look like, and a big, feathery, cuddly T-Rex just wouldn’t move merchandise, I don’t think. But it would still be rad.
And man…I would give ANYTHING for them to produce that John Sayles-scripted JP4 that was floating around years back. That shit was straight up BONKERS. Super-intelligent raptors bred in medieval Scottish castles with distinct personalities and armed with GUNS.
FUCK. YEA.
I say, when you hit the 4th film in a franchise, just let it all hang out. Get loose.
Eh, the pterodactyl scene felt like some filler stage from a bad Jurassic Park video game. Also, the JP dinos never looked faker than in that scene.
I think the main thing holding them back from doing feathers is just current CGI technology. They can still only sort of make hair look convincing, never mind feathers. Otherwise, I’m sure they’d do at least some feathery dinos, even if they don’t go all the way and cover t-rex with them.
I felt, with all the fog as a type of cover (like the T-Rex at night-time, in the rain in the first JP) they were able to make them look really convincing. Also there was some great tension in that scene too….probably the only part of the entire movie that felt like they were in DANGER. At least, to me it was. I think in large part due to the fact that I’d never seen pterodactyls used as a threat in any movie with dinosaurs in them….it felt fresh (and yes, I’m sure there are movies that DID portray them as dangerous, but I don’t remember any).
It was the goofy Spinosaur that looked super CG. And never mind all the dinos that looked on as they sailed down the river on the little steamboat or whatever it was. Those looked straight out of a video game (usually I HATE that argument, because most big-budget movies, as shitty as they may be, are miles beyond what any video game can currently do…but seriously, those dinosaurs looked video-gamey).
And I’d imagine feathers would be way easier to do than hair….is that not the case?
I think the dinosaurs looked the best in JP1 because they mixed CG with animatronics rather than just using all CG. In JP1, CG wasn’t as clean and detailed as is it is today which made it look more natural to me. In movies like Avatar and such, everything is in perfect HD detail, which isn’t how the real world or our vision works. To me, the CG always kind of looks video-gamey or at least unnatural and I prefer when it is mixed with animatronics, props, miniatures etc rather than just replacing ping pong balls.
The Pteranodon scene was actually a homage to the first book, when Grant and the kids enter the Cearadactylus enclosure in their boat and they start attacking them.
Yeah you forgot to mention Katy Perry’s forehead.
This article is all well in good, but it brings me back to my main problem with Jurassic Park III: Fuck the Spinosaurus. In that, fuck the idea of bringing in new dinosaurs to be the poster boys over the T-Rex and Raptor. Seeing the T-Rex get its neck snapped by the Spinosaurus was like watching my childhood die. The day people start getting bored by T-Rexes and Raptors is the day dinosaurs as a whole are no longer interesting, and the day I weep for humanity.
all well and good* Still probably not proper grammar, but at least it’s what I meant to type in the first place.
Yeah, nothing can replace T-rex. Trying to do that is always going to be a mistake. None of the guys I listed are really T-rex replacements.
“all well and good” is, in face, correct.
/The More You Know…
I’ve heard there was supposed to be a scene where the Tyrannosaurus comes back and annihilates the Spinosaurus, but they ran out of production time. That’s why the movie ends so abruptly. (Oh no, we’re screwe… hey, helicopters!)
Totally agreed. And let’s face it, birds are lame. They are especially lame when you reflect on the fact that they were probably once Dinosaurs. Now they’re birds, stupid annoying, shit on my car, steal my food at the beach, flu carrying birds. So, please, please for the love of God, no feathered Dinosaurs to remind us of their lame fate. It’s almost as bad as making Godzilla is a giant radioactive Iguana. I’m sure dinosaurs would agree. I personally would rather say my species was wiped out by an awesome, meteoric, death-metal-guitar-shredding, explosion then ever admit, or even acknowledge, that we eventually evolved into birds.
If they’re going for accuracy, they can start by making the raptors their actual size (about the size of a large turkey). What they used in the movies was a lot closer to Deinonychus, but I guess that doesn’t have the same ring as Velociraptor.
Spinosaurus always bothered me- Who the hell created it? Jurassic Park- the actual park- was shut down, how the hell were “new” dinosaurs developed? Any scientists were either eaten or evacuated in the first film. In The Lost World, they’re catching the dinosaurs to bring back (from a second island that also failed)- they’re going after existing dinosaurs they already created, not engineering more. That plan also fails, but somehow after all that I’m supposed to believe InGen has the resources, abilities, and interest in creating NEW dinosaurs?
I recently informed my friend that a JP 4 was in the works and we immediately began thinking of what wacky way both Ian Malcolm AND Alan Grant could end up on one of the two islands AGAIN. These guys have such terrible luck. Well, I guess Malcolm chose to go both times, as opposed to Grant who was duped into going to the second Island by William H. Macy.
Perhaps they’re both drugged and they wake up together on Isla Sorna because some dick wants to see them try to survive, but who knows. In all likely-hood the 4th movie will involve a park being built on the main land like InGen attempted in The Lost World. And not only that, the dinosaurs will be domesticated so people can saddle up and ride them on their morning commute.
Jeholopterus is not a scary name, change it to Joholopterus, now that’s scary.
Earthquake God Lizard is not only my favorite Japanese porno, it’s also the name of my speed metal band.
I’m pretty sure Spinosaurus was one of the first discovered dinosaurs – or has been discovered for over 60 years. There was apparently a fairly complete skeleton in Germany that was unfortunately destroyed during WWII bombing.