HBO released a slew of “Game of Thrones” season two photos yesterday, including brand-new images of returning favorites, like Daenerys, Jon Snow, and Hodor. Hodor? Hodor. But more importantly, there are also peeks of some new characters, too, expanding the “GoT” universe even further to include Onion Knights and prophetic priestesses. Let’s take a look, and of course: NO SPOILERS.
Character: Davos Seaworth
Character: Jon Snow
Add a little makeup, and Jon could fit right into the crowd of a midnight screening of The Crow. Dude loves the Cure.
Character: Theon Greyjoy
If Peter Dinklage was taller, this is what I imagine he’d look like. Theon is the captain of the ship with the best name in the Iron Fleet: Sea Bitch. I’ve also decided that “Pisswater Bend,” which is briefly mentioned in the second book, is where I want to live.
Character: Joffrey Baratheon
Character(s): Bran Stark and Hodor
I hate speaking ill of a Stark, but Bran was probably my least favorite main character in season one. Things should be better in season two, though, because he’ll be hanging out (off?) with Hodor a lot. And Hodor, clueless bastard he may be, is awesome.
Character: Sansa Stark
This is the most Sansa Stark photo ever.
Character: Daenerys Targaryen
This makes me happy, not only because it’s Daenerys, but because I don’t like seeing Emilia Clarke with brown hair. I mean, I do, because I’m not a monster, but the blonde is much better.
Character(s): Melisandre and Stannis Baratheon
I pictured her more crazy looking, not so composed and Cersei-like. Anyone else feel the same?
Character: Renly Baratheon
I want what’s on the wall behind Renly, who looks like a young Nathan Fillion. I’ve been looking for a painting on a dirty cloth depicting men haphazardly throwing arrows into the air. It’s my Lebowski rug.
Character: Arya Stark
Poor actress who plays Arya. She’s so…boy-like here, which is great for the role. Not so much for the everything else. At least Arya kicks major ass; she’s one of the best things about book two.
Character: Cersei Lannister
I hate her. That is all.
Character: Tyrion Lannister
I’m going to keep this vague and free of hyperbole: if the show does right by the end of the second book, it will be THE BEST THING EVER ON TELEVISION. Tyrion’s involved, so already it’s pretty great.
Character: Brienne
Amazing they got Tilda Swinton to do TV. She is a…very handsome woman?
Character: Balon Greyjoy
He’s come a long way since appearing in EuroTrip. There’s also some sick octopus action going on to his right.
Character: Catelyn Stark
It looks like she pulled down her fake beard to her neck. That Catelyn, such a jokester.
Character: Robb Stark
The only good Robb with two b’s out there.
