
Sad news, gang. One of Queen Elizabeth’s corgis — who appeared in the James Bond sketch during the Opening Ceremony of the London Olympics — passed away earlier this week. Oh man, I do not like that. I do not like that at all.
The palace on Sunday confirmed that Monty — who was previously owned by the Queen Mother — had died. It did not provide details on when or how Monty died, or the age of the dog, but added that another of the queen’s pets, dachshund-corgi crossbreed Cider, also had died.
With the death of Monty, Queen Elizabeth II now has two corgis in the palace — Willow and Holly — both of whom also appeared in the Olympics sketch. [ABC News]
[puts on black suit and sunglasses]
[presses play on boombox, clears throat]
How do Iiiiiiii SAY goodbye, to wha-at we haaa-aaa-aad? The good tiiiiiimes that MAAADE us laugh, outweigh the baa-aaaa-aaaa-aa-AAA-ad. I thought we’d geeeeeeeeeet to see for-ehh-ehh-ver, but for-EEEEEVVVV-er’s gone awayyyyy. It’s so haaa-aaard to say goodbyyyyyeee to yesterdayyyy-eeeeeeeee.
I doooon’t knoooww WHERE THIS ROAD is going to leeeeeaaaad. All I knooo-ooo-ow is WHERE we been, and a-WHAT we been throuuu-ouugh. Hooo-ooo-oooo. If we geeeeeeeeeet (get get) to see tomo-or-ow (OH-OO-WHOA), I HOPE it’s worth all the WAIIIIIIIIIT. It’s so haaa-aaard to say goodbyyyyyeee to yesterdayyyy-eeeeeeeee.
And I’ll taaaaaaaaake with me (take with me) the mem-OR-iieees to BE my sunshiiiine after the raiiiiiiiin. It’s so haaa-aaard to say goodbyyyyyeee to yesterdayyyy-eeeeeeeee.
[kicks into extra soulful voice]
And I’ll taaaaaaaaake with me (take with me) the mem-OR-iieees to BE my sunshiiiine after the raiiiiiiii-aaaaa-EEEEEEEEE-aaaaaaaa-EEEEEEEE-ain-ain.
It’s so haaa-aaard to say goodbyyyyyeee to yesterdayyyy-eeeeeeeee-eee-HEEEE-eeee-eee-eee-ee.
[pours out liquor]
Rest in peace.




Monty is short Montgomery…Monte,which is MY name, isn’t short for anything….that’s all I got.
Is your middle name Carlos?
I think you mean Carlo, 1,575,932nd person who has made that joke in my life.
[raises coffee mug, pours a sip onto office floor, gets called into HR]
If HR gives you any lip, you tell them to go fuck themselves. The death of a corgi is more important than any floor, gawddammit!
Our closing processional.
+100000
Her Royal Majesty will see you at the crossroads.
Danger.Thank you for making the Corgi for my son Jason Stock (In Memoriam) I am no longer able to view this. Is it possible that copy be sent to my email if it still exists . Our family is sorry to see Corgi Friday end, And thank you for all you have done.