All right. This is funny. Everybody try to stay with me here.
Jennifer Love Hewitt broke her wrist over the weekend. That is not the funny part, at least not by itself. Apparently she suffered the injury while she was working out in a boxing gym, as she tweeted “Guess who broke her wrist yesterday boxing to get fit for season two!;( I will be spending the weekend resting in my pjs.” This is still not funny, although it does lead me to believe that Jennifer Love Hewitt has been wildly misinformed about how long it takes broken wrists to heal, and that maybe she accidentally Googled “cool slumber party tips” instead of “ow my wrist hurts a lot help,” which is a fairly common mistake to make.
But anyway, I digress. Moving on.
The “season two” she mentioned in her tweet referred to her Lifetime series, The Client List, which is a show about a lady who works as a high-class prostitute in a massage parlor. This is a little funny, mainly because the show is set in Texas and all of the actors try to do Southern accents and some of them really should not be doing that. But more importantly, that little nugget gets us to the key piece of information at play here: In her role on the show, her character, a prostitute, who works at a massage parlor, frequently gives her clients a “happy ending,” where she brings them to climax using her hand.
You see? That is why it is funny that Jennifer Love Hewitt broke her wrist. Because HANDJOBS.
You are very welcome. Have a great afternoon.
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Wow, that took awhile.
Yup, that was the point.
It’s the journey, not the destination.
Ahhhhhhhh, now I get it…
It would be funnier if they wrote the injury into the show, maybe have her file a workers compensation claim for carpal tunnel syndrome.
Meanwhile, J Love (I call her J Love)… if you need any help rehabbing that injury, I’m there for ya, boo.
I see what you did there.
I think that joke took longer than most “Happy Endings”… and I don’t mean the show
Thank you!
So many sites on the internet are all snarky and quick-witted, and don’t understand that we readers might not know everything that’s going on. I appreciate you taking the time to explain the joke, so I could get it. Funny (if maybe a little rude)! If only we could get someone like you working on shows like Community, they’d go from a bunch of nonsense to something we all could enjoy. (Except for Chevy Chase. He gets it. Jokes about people being/seeming gay are always funny!)
Anyway, I just wanted to say, “thanks.” Sorry if I got a little distracted. I do that sometimes.
Now what’s on CBS tonight?
I’m not following. Could you please provide a diagram, or a picture (Preferably drawn in MS Paint) so I can follow along better?
269 word count to get to a hand job joke. My hats off to you Danger. A jolly good show!
You might even say he jerked us around.
bacon wins (like that’s ever not the case)
I get jokes.
Funniest Thing Possible: I write a post in which the actual joke is that I way, way over-explain a stupid joke, then some people don’t get it and accuse me of being the simple one for taking too long to get to the dumb handjob joke, like I don’t know how jokes work. The whole thing is getting meta as shit.
Saddest Thing Possible: Some of you apparently think I’m pretty fucking stupid.
Just slap a gallery on it.
Stupid is as stupid… uh… doesn’t get points of jokes.
“Some of you apparently think I’m pretty fucking stupid.”
“Just some though, sweetie.”
“Thanks, Mom.”
Not me. I saw what you did there.
would have been funny if you had split it into 10 pages we had to click through
can we get a diorama explaining the joke… preferably with a wookie
If she was a smurf, her name would be Handy.
I bet that wrist is really going to hurt while she’s moving her hand up and down an erect penis.
Excellent point.
Joke’s on you, Danger, she’s been using a handy double the whole time.
Both wrists? And her jaw?
[www.youtube.com]
What’s a handjob
Now, I may be mistaken, but I do believe that it was an old old wooden ship used during the civil war era
To quote Josh Baskins, I don’t get it.
Is her mouth broken? No? Good. Lights, camera, ACTION!!
Seriously…. Give me a Hanjo.
Hey, what a coincidence. I regularly injure my wrist thanks to Jennifer Love Hewitt.
Then quit trying to hit the delete all button with your wrist.
The fixes are so easy.
Y u no post a GIF?????
I’m just here to say I would enjoy a handjob from Jennifer Love Hewitt.