Has Boyd always talked like a snake, or is this just something I'm noticing now, in this snake-heavy season of Justified? Walton Goggins hissed a good chunk of his venomous dialogue in last night's episode, "Truth and Consequences," so, really, Billy should have known what was going to happen to him (unlike Jimmy). If only "certified spiritualist" Eve had been at the church, to not only warn the reverend that he ought not pick up the dripping-with-poison reptile, but to share a laugh at Raylan's expense with Boyd. Poor Raylan, that cocky SOB.
His gal left him (well, "left" him, but more on that later) with his hard-earned, ill-gotten money, he allowed a suburban housewife to escape his grasp, and he saw an FBI agent blast his brains out in front of him. On the plus side, he's got a Marshall stiffey, courtesy of learning Drew Thompson was a witness to Theo Tonin (Quarles' daddy) killing an FBI agent. But enough about all that distracting plot development; let's get back to the snakes.
Or, better yet, get to the random asides and then the SNAKE BITES FACE GIFs. Halloween 2013 is gonna be good. Oh, and Raylan's gonna be on Archer this week, so there's that as well.
- Sick Tombstone movie poster in your bedroom, Raylan.
- There are probably dozens of Tumblrs dedicated to Raylan's hats and Boyd's hair and Wynn's ties and various Crowders' swastikas, but there should be one about Ava's dresses, too.
- In his weekly EW postmortem, Graham Yost, when asked about SNAKE BITES FACE, said, "There is this great Carl Hiaasen book [Double Whammy] where a guy gets bitten by a pit bull. The pit bull just chomps onto his arm, and he shoots the pit bull but he can’t get the head off, so he just saws off the rest of the body and goes around through the rest of the book with this big lump wrapped around his arm, the head wrapped in a towel."
- Things are not going to end well for Johnny Crowder. Wynn Duffy could be Justified's Better Call Saul Goodman — where everything and everyone around them dies, they keep on living.
- Art was in fine form again. "Way to go, assholes."
- The actress who plays Ellen May, Abby Miller, is really pretty when she doesn't look like a strung-out addict.
- Last week, a hillbilly pissed on a cop; this week, Mason threatened to piss on Eve's ball-gag sock. That's a weird sentence.
- One thing Justified has taught me: every motel in Kentucky has been the scene of a crime at some point.
- Great acting in the scene where the snake bites Billy, from Boyd looking shocked that the reverend went through with it to Werepanther Cassie breaking down in tears at the thought of losing her brother like she did her dad.
- Pretty sure I'm reading too much into things here, but did anyone else notice Rachel looking at Raylan a little too long, and a bit longingly, during the bar scene? Not saying she has a crush on him, but...is there something there, or am I just writing fan fiction that ought not be written? Speaking of the bar scene: Lindsey, kidnapped or part of Randall's con?
- The real victim in "Truth and Consequences": Rachel, for falling for Raylan's "tap one shoulder, be on the other side" move.
- If you haven't already, do check out Maske's Guide to All Thing Olyphant.
- Line of the night: "Mr. Crowder?" "Yeah?"
- Reference to a seven-foot-tall basketball player of the night: MJ dunking on Manute Bol.
And now, courtesy of Chet Manley and his Gary Cooper walk, your GIFs.
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Although I enjoy Boyd and Raylan together. I’m really enjoying them having separate story lines for now. Boyd is such a powerful character just in his speaking. Also love having Win Duffy back again.
Cassie draining the snakes, clever girl.
My jaw hit the floor when the FBI agent splattered his own brains on the pavement. More Theo Tonin should be a very good thing.
The Boyd looked like he felt bad for the preacher…
So..was the safety pin what he was looking for? The money is in the safety pin?
I’m sure it’s been mentioned (late and too lazy to slog through 300+ comments), but I’m with you on the Rachel thing – that’s totally going to happen. Doesn’t hurt that it was set up by Art’s little speech to the Pappy Van Winkle-toting marshal last week.
I was not expecting Billy to eat it so soon. Nice play by the writers though. The sister is still an x factor.
Anybody else think Boyd and the sister are hooking up before the season is over, and Ava will be finding out, leading to a slapfight?
Sweet, sweet snake assisted murder sex.
@El Cunado – I actually thought they were gonna get it on in that tent.
So when is Tim going to snap? And who is he going to kill? I love Tim, but he needs to kill more people.
This isn’t where I parked my car.
we need another headshot. maybe Boyd’s military pal will be the lucky winner.
Raylan should have known not to trust the bartender. She has a baby voice.
Concur!
Sounded and even looked a bit too much like Julie Benz.
A mention of Devil and his duplicitous fate was nice. Pour out a pabst for the fallen.
Yeah I was thinking about him, but I only have Grimbergen (Blanche)
Well, that’s too good for Devil. Dishwater is about right.
i have a stiffy over this season thats for sure.
Yeah, but is it a Marshall Stiffy?
I’ve got a bad feeling Art is going to bite it this season.There has been way too much retirement talk, fathering the other marshals, and this case seems to be a bit of a full circle for him. Which would suck because Art is all that is awesome
Plus side is that it might send Raylan into a vengeful rage that could lead to a pretty steep body count.
Raylan’s “vengeful rage” last season after his state trooper buddy got killed was fairly underwhelming. Sooooo….not saying I want Art to die, but an excuse to see an actual RAMPAAAAAAGE would be nice.
maybe all that pent up anger will pay off this season
The vertical ones tend to get over zoomed up in the posts so:
Relevant Bartender GIF
Oh, she’d get over zoomed, all right.
DUDE! BLOW IT UP!
Does anyone else think that Billy is going to survive this bite and be able to prove to his flock that Boyd is true evil but God is more powerful than evil and spur them to continue making his life more difficult?
Evidently, Yost has already confirmed that he died from the snake bite.
If we do wind up seeing more members of the Tonin family, I hope we get a look at the adopted black son, Mel A. Tonin.
Well done, Otto
Well done indeed.
Anyone else think of Charlie’s “milk steak” when they were talking about milked snakes? [www.uproxx.com]
Also, I realized that I just made a great set-up for a dick joke. Someone knock it out of the park for me….
Living in Kentucky would be much more tolerable if the guys around here looked more like Raylan Givens instead of various Crowder hangers-on. Justified is lying to you, people.
TV people are more attractive than real-life people???? That, sir, is crazy talk.
I was thinking to myself “oh come on, there’s no way he even survived making it to the bar if a poisonous snake bit him in the goddamn face.” But hot damn the writers were clever about that, and the acting sold it.
Thank God for the writers though. My dumb ass needed the sister to come clean before I finally put it all together.
It was really well done the way Walton Goggins’ showed the light bulb going off over his head when the “Ah ha!” moment arrived.
Marshal stiffy’s becoming a nice running gag. Justified, taking a lesson from Archer.
That fed blowing his brains out was pretty brutal. And between the out-of-frame close-up of that and the facial snake bite, this episode was much gorier than the average episode of this show. Actually, I guess you could say the same of the season as a whole, with Waldo Truth’s cratering and Arlo cutting that guy’s throat.
Also it wouldn’t surprise me if you were right about Rachel and Raylan, but if something were to go down there, I kind of think it would be more of a tryst situation than a real relationship.
also, how does eve look so good after thirty years? was she married at 15? it is kentucky, so…
Thank you! They said she was a grandma too, so I’m inclined to think she’s a long lost Boo Boo family member.
Watching last night, I realized I could watch spinoff episodes on each of the residents of Charming that were at Billy’s church. Seriously, did you see the people in that crowd?
Charming? Were Unser and Filthy Phil there?
Dammit, now I really want to see a Sons/Justified crossover. Especially if it’s revealed that Venus Van Damme really was just Boyd Crowder after dark.
I said it before, but if he still had his giganto beard, I’d love to see Hurst take a trip to Harlan.
God, that’d be perfect.
WHY?! SO WE COULD GET OUR HEARTS BROKEN ALL OVER AGAIN?!?!?!
OH WHY OPIE?! WHY?!?!
IT SHOULDA BEEN YOU TARA!
*sniff*
it should have been you.
COUSIN JOHNNY, YOU TREACHEROUS BASTARD. I never liked the guy.
i can’t help but feel johnny is gonna die by limehouse’s hand.
Maybe that triangulates Boyd against Lime House?
mmmm… it’s good. could use more limehouse though.
Yeah where is he? I’m guessing he’ll end up fucking some shit up too. That preacher guy’s sister is also going to get interesting.
I’m not sure, but I seem to remember reading somewhere that we wouldn’t see Limehouse this season.
Also so how long does Wynn Duffy last?
Wynn Duffy is like an evil Saul Goodman. that motherfucker is going to be around forever.
Still no mustache. Like Samson, I fear he is weak and vulnerable without it.
So who dies first Ellen May or Boyd’s cousin?
They fight each other, in a snakepit full of un-milked rattlers.Two crooks enter, one crook leaves! Welcome… to Crackerdome!
Wow…so Boyd letting the snake bite that priest was bad ass. Boyd Crowder is one cold mother fucker.
but he looked sorry whe he was walking out.
maybe he’s all rainbows and butterflies on the inside.
So if we get to see Raylan on Archer, what are the chances we get H Jon Benjamin…or Aisha Tyler!…on Justified? Please?
That would be great. Also, I’d love to see Rob Mcelhenney as a martial arts instructor of some kind on the show. Would’ve been great as one of the fighters last episode
OMG! You just blew my mind! But he would obviously have to make the “whsh, whsh, whsh!” noise.
Charlie Kelly, King of the Rats + Dewey Crowe = YES
Dear lord yes! And Sweet Dee could be “Oxy Whore # 3″ in the trailer!
Actually, let’s get the crazies together: Raffi, Charlie, and Krieger up to Harlan County!
My avatar wholly approves of this idea.
I’d settle for Charlie and Mac taking over as bouncers/bartenders at the bar. I want to see Raylan’s reaction to being called bro, and to getting threatened with getting bit in the neck
Raylan reacting to Raffi’s proposition of a jerkoff party would also be great to see
Mac would give Raylan an ocular patdown.
I really dislike snakes, so this one left me a little shaky. That said, Raylan always saves it and Boyd was great.
But enough snakes for an entire series.
yeah the rattler biting a dude’s face is basically my worst nightmare shown to me on screen. just… no.
My sister kept saying that they needed to bring a mongoose the entire time they were in the church.
Goddamit, I always get to these discussions waaay too late to make a meaningful contribution.
So I’ll just complain about my problems instead. DERP!
EVERY week, I can’t get my work computer to log in. This week, it works, and there are already 100 comments by the time I get here!
/second your DERP
I usually just come and shout at the wall of text. Like I’m in Israel except less holy and with a lot more talk about booze.
I have a similar problem, but it’s the internet, so I spew bullshit anyway. I can’t watch tv shows that start at 10:00pm, I’m at work by 6:00am.
Where did Ava get mentioned as psychic? I know Drew Thompson’s wife (Eve?) was psychic, but Ava?
That was my fault. Typo. And by typo, I mean brain fart.
Anyone else have a feeling that Wynn and Boyd join forces and Wynn shows his loyalty to Boyd by handing up Jonny?
Oh snap Boyd Crowder badge!
I got really really excited when they said Ava was a psychic. I love it when they nod to any of the books
Damn, I mean Eve.
I was pleased that the sister wasn’t just a con artist and that her brother was a true believer. They really did a great job of giving both those characters depth.
Jere Burns should have a small part in every show. He’s brilliant.
Small?
Well, every show can’t be the Jere Burns Power Hour. Most, but not all.
Every hotel room in Kentucky has also been the scene of a wife swap.
The best kind of swap! I guess…
I thought that Lindsey was trying to find the money involved with Drew Thompson. Also, I think it’s Ella May but that’s pedantic.
I Love that when Boyd walks into the church the people already hate him, so when he leaves they probly think hes the son of Satan and Medusa.Plus:Sick Tombstone movie poster in your bedroom, Raylan.
Probably the hardest I laughed was looking at Raylan’s face when Rachel was defending herself from Art by pointing out Raylan’s shortcomings and referring to him as Wyatt Earp.
Art : “He’s a lost cause.”
It’s the little dialog gems like this that keep me happy:
FBI Guy: “You have no idea who these people are.”
Raylan: “I will if you tell me.”
The whole exchange prior to Raylan telling the guy he was on personal business was just gold. Raylan just feeding him rope to hang himself with.
Another bit of dialogue I liked was when Raylan referred to Lindsey’s ex, saying how he wouldn’t be able to knock him down with a hammer
Or when he went back to the Jim.
“Did he look scared? Nevermind”
I can’t wait to see this Drew Thompson character. Gonna be neat to find out whom is responsible for all of these Marshal hards on.
If he’s not Lindsey’s ex, he’s probably got connections to him. No one had a picture of him, and the FBI guy was at the gym at the time that he and Raylan were supposed to fight
@Hardcore the FBI Guy was at the gym because he followed Raylan.
Also Drew Thompson was a pilot 30 years ago, so at the youngest he would be like 50. So Lindsay’s ex isn’t old enough to be Drew Thompson.
@SHough OK, I wasn’t sure if he actually followed him or if he was working independently and Raylan suggesting that the FBI guy had followed him was a way of messing with him to see what he knew
Ava’s been responsible for at least three of my Marshall hard ons
I personally believe it’s Arlo. But it’s just a hunch.
Yeah, I think it’s Arlo.
It’d be awesome if it were Art.
So Arlo got Waldo Truth to fall out of a plane with a diplomat bag filled with coke, and then recovered the bag and Waldo’s license and hid it inside the wall of his house? Possible!
I know it’s late but the FBI guy was there because that’s where the Psychic lady told him Drew Thompson would be. She did so because she knew Raylan would be there at that time and was hopping Raylan would put it together and save her.
Forget team Bartender, I am now on team Eve Monro. She’s cougarific.
Mrs. Dutch Wagenbach
I’ve been on her team since the early ’90s. I looked up her resume on IMDB and she’s been on many, many shows I watched growing up.
I used to occasionally watch an early 90′s movie called Livin’ Large that was pretty terrible (even as a twelve year old I knew it was bad) because she was gorgeous in it.
If there are any Dexter fans here, you will recognize her from S4 as Trinity’s wife.
I believe she was also in the Seinfeld Frogger episode.
@Palin I thought I recognized her from somewhere. More likely from Dexter than Seinfeld. Though I like Seinfeld more, they had a high turnover for girlfriends
Ah yes, the Frogger episode. A great episode indeed!
I was thinking maybe Billy had built up a tolerance to the snake venom from whatever small amount he may have been exposed to when he was bitten. I also thought it was a possibility that Boyd was bluffing about having a snake in the toolbox, there was just a tape recorder in there or something.
I kind of figured he had a tolerance as well.
Since the sister said she didn’t want Billy to die like their dad, I assumed she had milked all the snakes Billy ever got bit by, so they were all dry, so he had no tolerance.
When that came out I figured he must have at least been getting low doses from time to time.
I was thinking about the tape recorder move too. Maybe a little too highfalutin for country folk like this.
Tape recorder? I think we all know that Botd doesnt pla those kinds of games. Especially after ole girl told him they weren’t scared of him. “It would seem we have underestimated each other”…here have a snake.
I did not pick up on the milked snakes at all until it was mentioned.
Well I figured since the dude who’s face got bit (Jimmy?) survived, but was still in pretty bad shape, he probably got at least some venom, so I figured that would carry over to Billy as well.
I thought he was done at first, like Budd in “Kill Bill,” but then I remembered that some of those funky snake charmer Churches do use the devenomized snakes. As did Jake “The Snake” Roberts when he used a cobra.
Then again some don’t and they end up like ol’ Timmy did. Throw him in the T-Rex paddock.
I for sure thought the preacher was gonna shock everyone and handle that snake unscathed.
I thought so too. And the way he got bit was almost non-chalant, like it just happened. If this were another show, there’d of been a big dramatic pause and music swell with a close up of the bite.
Question. I have FX but I fell asleep early last night and I am an ignorant foreigner. Is there anywhere I can watch this legitimately online?
FX will re-air the episode sometime during the week.
Also should eventually be up on-demand if you have it.
In soviet Russia, ‘Justified watches you’.
They also have been running the earlier season episodes after the late encore of each week’s original.
Last night’s was the one with the kids in the brothel.
If you have Comcast it’ll be on-demand after next week’s episode. I think it’s on Hulu+ as well. It’ll also be on FX late Tuesday night, midnight on Wednesday.
I thought Rachel definitely had a bit of interest in Raylan, from the looks on her face to the way she asked about his girl. I wonder if that will go anywhere. *Wondering out loud stiffy*
I mean she’s got ladyparts, of course she’d hit it.
There is no way they are going to kill Billy this soon is there?
They did
I also thought something was going on with Rachel. It would be nice if something interesting happened to her for the first time ever.
she got divorced. that’s interesting
No its not. At this point its pretty much average
it’s only average to you because you care about the character. i could give a shit about her.
I meant in the American social landscape, its pretty much average that a marriage ends in a divorce at this point. But I agree with you, out with Rachel bring on more of Tim and Art’s stiffies.
Wait, what?
Was I the only one thinking at one point Randall might actually be Drew Thompson or did I end up too much Bourbon* again? Also, the development of the Drew Thompsons story is giving me a viewer stiffy.
*Bulleit if anyone is asking
*end up drinking too much Bourbon. Clearly the answer is yes since I can’t get an intelligible comment together and its after 1pm.
I think Randall’s waaaay too young to be a guy that’s been presumed dead for 30+ years and already had a family at that point.
Bulleit is good.
My favorite bourbon that I can afford.
I was thinking that too, but I forgot the part that Thompson was presumed dead for 30 years. There’s probably some connection to Randall, maybe he’s the owner of the boxing gym?
I was confused by that at first too (coincidentally, I had also been drinking). The only reason the FBI guy showed up at the gym was because Eve told her kidnapper about the gym (which she foresaw/heard Rayland talk about) in order for him to run into Raylan. I don’t think Thompson has any relation to the gym or to Randall
drank a shit ton of bulleit too.