Anyone who watches Game of Thrones — and I know everyone reading this does — has encountered having to try to explain the show to people who’ve never seen it. It’s a bitch, right? I mean, where to even begin. SO. MANY. LAYERS.
Well, Redditor futurepilgrim encountered the same problem and helpfully came up with a solution we can all use going forward.
I imagined if you had never seen Game of Thrones an easy way to explain the character of each of the families vying for the Iron throne would be to compare them to a metal band.
So simple, yet so brilliant.Wish dude would have done one for the Targaryens though. Wonder what band they would be? Heart? (Not really metal, I know, but it sprang to mind, for some reason.)
Anyway, the Starks are obviously above, while the Lannister’s and the Greyjoy’s are below for your entertainment.
(Imgur via Brett Martin)
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So, this is for the people who don’t have HBO and still live in the 80s? What a large sampling of the American Public.
Renly Baratheon and the Tyrells: Judas Priest?
I was thinking GNR for the Tyrells because of the roses.
I figured Judas Priest because of the gay thing.
Long term though, GNR makes more sense.
I should have refreshed the page before I commented.
The Lannisters/Poison comparison is terrible. All the adult Lannisters are METAL AS FUCK.
In fact, I’ll say that Motorhead is a better comparison. Tyrion is as ugly as Lemmy (at least in the books)
I thought Poison was a bad comparison too. The Lannisters are Metallica. A bunch of self absorbed entitled fucks whose maximum metal cannot be denied. Tyrion is Cliff Burton.
I would say Megadeth. Mainly because I hate them.
Kungjitsu gets it. They were great, they’re still like *the* Metal Band to most commoners, but really all their power is with their earlier years, and the just continue to shit on and sabotage their own legacy over and over again. Fuck yea, the Lannisters are totally Metallica. The question is, does Metallica have any salvageable cool members who totally would still make great music if they could but are trapped? Because that’d be their Tyrion…
‘Tallica would be better for the Lannisters, but eventually more than one of them ends up being likable, so that kinda rules out that comparison.
I bet Lars would mellow out a lot if you cut off his hand.
Too soon. I mean, too early. Whatever. Shit hurts.
Jason Newstead was pretty cool when he was in Metallica. He left around the whole Napstar fiasco too, so maybe he could be the Tyrion of the group.
^ Excellent call on actually making the Metallica-Lannister thing work by bringing in Jason Newstead. He’s the only one of them I have any remaining respect for, precisely because he left. What you’re telling me is that he’s in Essos, that’s why we never hear from him anymore?
What about House Baratheon? Maybe Judas Priest due to Renly and Rob Holford sharing the same interests. Plus Baratheon’s motto “Ours is the Fury: sounds like it could have been a Judas Priest song.
Probably has to be Kiss. One time the ruler of rock and roll, but quickly became a joke.
Both of those work so well.
Am I the only one thinks the line, “They aren’t the Lannisters” is fuckin stupid? That’s like saying, “Turtles. They aren’t komodo dragons.”
I think you need to put this on the wikipedia entry for turtles.
I can’t be the only one thinking Dragonforce for the Targaryens right?
It fits, but the Targaryens are too badass to be assocated with Dragonforce. I’d say they’re more like early In Flames.
So who would be the Freys? They’re assholes but there’s so GD many of them. Plus, ugly as shit. Slipknot maybe?
Juggalos
The Melvins (They had two drummers!)
“Heart”? *snickers at Caj* Whatever grandpa.
That was tough for me to admit and you just shit all over me.
Heart is the closest thing to Zeppelin that the US ever produced.
I SAID IT.
Great idea, horrible execution. No family compares to Poison unless that family arrives late, plays mediocre music and is successful with sixth graders. This person either doesn’t understand Poison or the Lannisters.
I think you have to go with Metallica for the Lannister house. The band started out badass and has been slowly undone by a quest for influence and power. Ready to starve its own people and turn on its bandmates for the sake of an extra buck. Kiss might be a decent alternative.
Greyjoy – Much more like Black Sabbath. One of the original metal bands, but really not that bad ass. Theon and Ozzy are both pussies that enjoyed more fame and success on their own. When reunited with the band, disaster for the family ensues. The band was probably better with Dio / Theon’s sister in charge.
Starks – Zeppelin. Heavy but total devotion to rock’s origin in the blues and the old gods of rock and roll.
You,sir, are a fucking genius.
Game over. We can all move along. It’s this… It’s all of this.
House Bolton is Cannibal Corpse.
Definitely, except way more serious.
House Mormount is Slayer because Bear Island is hardcore as fuck.
Yes. But Bear Island could also be the title of a XXX gay porno, and instead of being hardcore as fuck… Its a bunch of big gays hardcore fucking…… So, there’s that.
I hate going to Reddit and Buzzfeed, so I appreciate it when the occasional worth-while article is shared. Bravo, Cajun Boy!
And another thing, I really love it when taint lint like the now-nuked “Chipper Bones” play the “you steal from Reddit” card. Reddit is a site that was virtually built on users stealing shit and posting it as their own work, William. I’ve had it happen to me numerous times — as has anyone who’s been on the internet for more than five minutes. Do we occasionally post stuff from Reddit? Yes, obviously, as do most successful sites on the web. But when we do we credit it and link back to where it originated, as I did in this post. THERE’S A DIFFERENCE, SHITSTAIN!!!
Now since Matt is gone and not coming back do both of us a favor and go the fuck away and never return, please.
Haha, taint lint.
What, no Manowar? Seems like an obvious choice.